Head Games

I feel like every climbing trip I take always gives me an opportunity really think about my strengths and weaknesses as a climber. It's often very humbling--which is something that I think everyone needs once in a while. My last trip to the Red River Gorge in Slade, KY was no exception.

For some time I have struggled endlessly with my fear of leading. When I first started leading, I absolutely dreaded it. In the gym on easy 5.7s? Sure. Outside on what I perceived to be "run-out" slab at Roadside? Uhhh...different story. With time, things have been getting better, but I am still incredibly reluctant to lead climb at grades that I should. In other words, routes that I am perfectly capable of on-sighting on top-rope, I hang my way up on lead. I get so completely frustrated with this clearly mental issue. I am often eager to try routes on lead in theory, but by the time I get there, I decide that I just want to climb the route and forget about being stressed by climbing on lead.

I'm sure I'm not the first person in the world to have this problem...but the question is how do you get over it? Some people, namely my primary climbing partner, thrive off of the uncomfortable feeling of making desperate moves five feet past the last bolt. I am not one of them. Even in the uber-controlled environment of the gym, I have trouble getting myself into a head space where I can work a route on lead. Why is this? Am I really that much of a wuss?? Perhaps all climbers have different thresholds for discomfort in ambiguous situations and I am just at the low end of the spectrum. So how do you fix it? I try to force myself to get over it--sometimes I'm successful, and other times not as much. But I do know one thing: I will continue to work as hard as I can to conquer my fears so I can become the kind of climber that I want to be.

On a lighter note, my trip was super fun. I got to spend time with quality people, climb some sweet routes, and hang out in the woods all weekend. Where is the bad in any of that? I'd have to say the highlight was following/cleaning Whiteout at Emerald City at sunset. So beautiful! That was possibly one of my best climbing memories ever. It was also very cool to watch the boys throwing themselves at hard stuff. Such awesome lines. Good for them for having the drive to push themselves so hard!

In other news, I am WAY excited for this Friday. My local climbing gym is holding a casual climbing competition--Battle of the Ages--that promises to be a really good time. Can't wait to climb with friends and hang out!